Mental Health – Panic Disorder – Depression – Anxiety – My Story
- Excess Worrying
- Abnormal Body Movements
- Feeling like you will fall while walking
- Mood Swings
- Could not sleep
Read below you will find some help:
This is my first time when I am writing a blog that relates to my story and thought would help the dear and loved ones who are going through this.
My Real Life Story
I am in Panic disorder, Anxiety, and Depression for the last two years.
How it happened to me:
ALCOHOL WHICH LED ME TO PANIC ATTACK FOR FIRST TIME:
For me it was alcohol, I am 32 years old and suffering from Panic disorder for the last two years.
Let me tell you my story:
For two years I was working and staying in Mumbai. At that time I was drinking alcohol daily and excess on weekends.
On weekdays I was drinking at the night around 2 to 3 beers and then sleep. Some times it goes to more than 3 beers which result in taking off from my office giving different reasons that I am not well and all.
After some time I had some money and I thought to take leave for 10 days from the office and will stay at home. For 10 days I was drinking alcohol regularly day and night.
WHAT THEN HAPPENED WAS CANT EXPLAIN
On the eleventh day, I woke up and I was fine. It started watching tv and suddenly I felt like something is happening to me.
And then it took place, a sudden intense fear that happened to me and was my body was behaving abnormally. I thought I am losing control, felt it is a heart attack and I will die.
I called up my office friend as my office was nearby. It told him something is happening to me please come then it thought after ten minutes he reached my place. In that 10 minutes I have taken bucket and put cold water on me with clothes on, my whole room was with water and I started feeling I real danger.
My friend asked what happen and told him to book a cab fast otherwise I will die and I was roaming here and there with God’s name that please save me from this.
50,000 thoughts were in my mind and they are telling me that you will die, I felt like that my left hand is no more and my stomach will blast and my feet, different palpitations. I took an auto with my friend and the hospital was nearby 10 minutes distance but it felt like 4 hours to me.
The moment I reached hospital, where my friend was paying the rickshaw driver I ran and enter the general ward shouting out loud that I am dying please someone saves me. On the opposite side, there was ICU and the nurse told me to wait as the doctor is in ICU.
But I was not in the condition to wait I directly opened the door and went to ICU and saying that I am dying please save me. The doctor told me to relax and lie down in bed they checked my BP and Pulse and till that time my condition was much worse. I imagined seeing negative images as they were really like a ghost haunted or possessed me.
My throat was feeling dry as It will come out. The tractor is running on my chest.
They told me not to talk but I told them If I will not talk I will definitely die. I told my friend not to inform my mom and dad as they were in Jammu. I told him to only inform them if I would die.
Then the doctor called someone and then gave me an injection and glucose. The medicine took around 40 minutes to react and then I felt like I am safe now.
The doctor called a Psychiatrist who guided him to give the medicine and I was under observation for 24 hours. At 10: 00 pm IST the psychiatrist came and I asked him what was that happening to me. He told me that it is a Panic attack.
He told me that no one dies with a Panic attack but the feeling is mutual. There are mild and severe attacks and mine was severe. He gave me medicine for 10 days and told me you will be fine. I told him that If it happens again what should I do, he had also mentioned SOS tablet in case of a Panic attack which will take away that feeling.
Believe me or not Panic attack is dangerous to control with the help of medication.
I took the medicine for 10 days and went again to the doctor and I was fine. It did not have to take SOS medicine for that 10 days other medicines were working well.
But again bad things take time to go, after around a month I took alcohol with my friends again and the next day it happened again but with a mild attack and I took SOS and went to the doctor and stayed there for around 2 hours until to goes.
Several times it happened to me the feeling which I think no one understands and will only pass negative comments.
And one day I realized I will seriously die if I won’t control my mind. Then I stopped alcohol went to the office regularly working. I am an Email Marketing and LinkedIn Marketing specialist and I was hardworking when it comes to delivering the outputs.
After three months I talked to my boss that can I work from my home town (Jammu) and he gave them permission to work. Firstly I was worried that I am suddenly quitting alcohol and also going to my home where I would not be able to drink as my mother hate alcohol.
But I did not change my decision and went to Jammu. When you will is strong and your loved ones are around you. You will definitely win. It’s not around 11 months since I have not touched alcohol and I am regularly taking my medicines. My medicines also got reduced as I am improving.
For others who are feeling the same, I strongly tell them to consult any doctor that can help them. As many people’s favourite line is “Don’t think, be positive” and I hate this line as the one who is suffering would only understand his daily fight with this.
So a good doctor would help you with medicines and also walk for around 1 hour, stretch your muscles when you are feeling like your head is spinning and little anxiety – take head and shoulder massage from your mom or someone it would make you feel better.
If I can do I am sure you can also do it.
Relax, Avoid taking stress whether it is an office or personal, healthy lifestyle, and keep yourself busy.
With these, you will surely control your mind in some time and with the help of treatment.
I am posting this for the first time in my entire life and today got the strength to write my own story that some in help can relate to this and overcome this feeling.
Tons of Love to everyone from my side.